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Still reflecting on the implications of Super Size Me? Sometimes the way forward can be found by looking back at how things were done in the past. Nowadays many of us feel we have to go to the gym—in part because we drive everywhere instead of walking. Walking does burn calories and thus can help prevent weight gain. Now, using the latest technology, a good old-fashioned walk in the Peak District can determine whether or not your efforts to loose weight measure up...

The device in question can be found installed in several locations, and is constructed almost entirely from recyclable natural products. It's environmental friendliness is further enhanced by low power requirements—typically requiring less than one calorie to operate. This requirement does, however, rise considerably in the case of users who exceed the device's WATT (wide ass thick thigh) tolerance limit. Such users do of course stand to gain from this, as there is at least a 10-fold weight-reducing increase in calorie requirement for successfully overcoming the WATT restrictor mechanism. The basic architecture of the WATT Restrictor (code-name "Basalt") can be seen in the following photograph:

The WATT restrictor

Those users who find themselves WATT-restricted, but who fail to make an adequate effort to overcome the mechanism, may be encouraged by the Facilitator add-on (known during product development as "Stinging Nettle"; bottom-left in the above photo).

During testing earlier today near Tissington using subjects with normal-range BMIs (body mass index), we encountered no problems with reliability or build-quality. We anticipate the widespread installation of similar devices in strategic locations (for example, in the entrance of fast food outlets, at supermarket checkouts, outside changing rooms at public swimming baths, etc.)

The WATT restrictor under test

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